OooOOOoo... a Fwaggle!
Have you ever noticed that, as you get older, you realize how utterly stupid the makers of childrens' programming thought you were? I think about it -- probably more often than I should -- and it never ceases to piss me off.
Case in point for today: Fraggle Rock
Now, you'll be hard pressed to find anyone who's a bigger fan of anything and everything that Jim Henson touched. The Dark Crystal was the first DVD I ever bought. Emmit Otter's Jugband Christmas and A Muppet Family Christmas are required holiday viewing in my house. My first tattoo (of which I have over 20) was of Kermit the Frog. In my mind, Jim Henson was one of the great geniuses of the 20th Century, and he was taken from us far too soon.
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/5817/3032/320/gobo.jpg)
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/5817/3032/200/doozer.jpg)
Fine. I can buy that.
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/5817/3032/320/gorgs.jpg)
Fine. I'll buy it. Scientists discover new species of creatures all the time. These ones can have gone unnoticed for all this time.
But here's where things get fuzzy, and I get pissed. The Fraggles and Doozers live underground in a sort of H.G. Wells The Time Machine Morlocks sort of way. But the Trach Heap, her rat -things, and the Gorgs appear to live ABOVE GROUND. The Gorgs grow radishes (which the Fraggles can't resist). They have a GARDEN which requires SUNLIGHT and RAIN to grow. Honestly, if that's the case, these fuckin' things live right in Doc's backyard. Yet nobody knows they exist?
That, I cannot buy.
What other programs have been trying to pull the wool over my eyes since I was just a wee lad? Don't think you're going to get away with it. I'm on to you.
Assholes.
~S. Rick
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